Thursday, November 06, 2003

Greatest Movie Run Evar

We went to see Matrix Revolting last night. Before you read any further, you must see the Attack Plan I made. Do it.

I arrived at theater at around 4:00, and was the 2nd person in line. Which meant I was the 8th person in line (she was holding spots for a group of people.) At 6:00, they started letting us into the theater. At first, there was only one person taking tickets, which was fine. But then a second guy shows up and says "I can help people over here." I broke ranks and followed 2 people in front of me and went over to him, but then discovered to my horror that he was a Ticket Fumbler. He was just incredibly slow. I broke into a sweat as I watched the original ticket-tearer-upper stream people past her.

Eventually I was let in, and then the unbelievable happened: behind me, I hear Pusateri yell out "Hey, is that Keanu Reeves?" Oh My God, he's actually executing The Plan! Someone else in the crowd yelled out "hey, I think it is!" Because of my Ticket Bumbler, Travis was slightly ahead of me and he took the near entrance to the theater. That was slightly against The Plan, but like any good soldier he improvised under extreme cicrumstances. I therefore took the far entrance.

Pat was a bit behind us, and was slowly walking inside. He was with Craig, a last-minute addition to our group who didn't know about The Plan. He told Pat "Come on, we need to get our seats quickly." Pat held his ground and said "no, this is my job. I'm supposed to block." Craig is a big guy and immediately says "hey, I can do that!" So the two of them leisurely walked into the theater side by side, creating a backlog of people behind them.

Travis and I scrambled up into the stadium section from opposite sides and converged at seat 9 in 2 different rows. (Our group grew to 7 people, so we decided we'd do the 4-3 split.) We had excellent seats.

Two things amazed me:
1) People actually executed The Plan.
2) The Plan worked flawlessly.

As far as our last-minute civilian additions are concerned:
Chuck arrived very early to wait in line with me. He will make a fine recruit for future missions.
Craig demonstrated excellent blocking skills.
Martell... Well, Martell showed up at 6:35 for a 6:30 movie, delayed by the armful of food he picked up at the concession stand. He'll have to go to basic training, but we'll make a soldier out of him yet.

Oh, and the movie sucked.

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